I Quit!

Well, I harvested potatoes again on Monday morning at the organic farm. It's actually pretty fun getting all grimy in the garden. It's kind of like searching for buried treasure when you're digging around trying to find potatoes. Half the time I would come up with a rock in my hand. Hmm. That sounds like I was diving for potatoes. No, it was just my hand that was submerged. It's also an exercise in self-control because I had to stop myself from screaming when a bug would run over my bare foot or hand...because I tell the girls not to scream and fuss when such things happen to them. So I have to practice what I preach. " It's a bug. So get over it." For the most part, the girls did very well and didn't complain.

They were enthralled with the free range chickens and climbed into their large fenced in area in order to commune with them more closely ( the electric fence was turned off, as opposed to last time when one of them got a significant jolt when she reached out to pick some flowers beyond the fence). They gathered and "adopted" some eggs. Two girls were insistent upon the fact that they were going to keep their egg warm for twenty eight days ( the length of time recommended by the farmer) so it could hatch. They named the egg Damien and took it everywhere that day...even to the lake, where it sat on a towel as the girls swam. I haven't seen hide nor shell of it today so I wonder how little Damien is faring.

But the big news is that I gave my notice at work yesterday. Yes, my dears, I am going to resign my position at AGS. It wasn't the digging in the potato field that pushed me over the edge. This is the result of many months of prayers, hopes, questions, and providential circumstances. It looks as if we are moving to Georgia in a couple of months and the commute would just be too much. I mean, I think half an hour is bad...! Try twenty four hours of driving. Too much wear and tear on the car, I think. So, it's been a fairly momentous decision and a lot has been happening in the last few months; things are falling into place in such a way that it looks like God is directing us out of our little nest and out into the great unknown. It's a good thing though; I'm pretty excited and looking forward to it. It's going to be a super busy next month and a half...In two weeks, we're flying out to California w/Nate and Pen to clean out Grandpa's house, which has been sold- hallelujah. And then, two weeks after we come home, I will quit work, start packing, attend the Feast of Harvest, and then drive down to GA to look for a house. Upon finding The House, wherever it may be, we will drive back, pack up, and move down. Back to back round trips from NH to GA...? Yes, we are crazy. I am dreading it like The Great Tribulation. I think maybe I should be sedated the entire way for both road trips. Sedation worked for the wisdom teeth extraction; why not this? Either that or have one of those mini-vans that has a DVD player...so I can pass the time in a happy, distracted, passive state. Ooog.

I go hog wild in Toadstool

Today I got a birthday present! Rather, I used a birthday present. I went to the Toadstool Bookstore to use a Gift Certificate that I got from Dad and Mom Pass on my last birthday. Thanks again, Dad and Mom! This is a record; usually it takes me about a year to use up a Gift Certificate. I used it all up today, and more; I splurged. Splurge splurge splurge. Isn't that a funny word? It makes me think of lips. Anyway- moving on in the stream of consciousness...

( Brad says that sometimes when I do my stream of consciousness thing out loud in conversation, it's like tickling him. I guess it bothers him and amuses him simultaneously. But then, Brad says a lot of things. He also says that living with me is good training for having a teenage daughter someday. To be fair, I begged him to tell me what he was thinking, and that was it...)

I actually bought a brand new hard cover book. I NEVER do that. I almost always get used books...but this was a new book in a series that I had read about a year ago...and so after an almost exhaustive perusal of the store, I took el plunge-o. I suppose I could have looked for it in the library someday...but I WANTED it, so I got it. After all, what are Gift Certifs for, if not to GET WHAT YOU WANT?! I also got a used childrens' book, and a blank book/journal and exceeded the Gift Certificate a bit ( why do I always have the urge to say Gift Snertificate?).

Giving me a gift snertificate to a bookstore is one of the best things you can do for me. It sends me into paroxysms of joy to really indulge in a good, hearty browse but at the same time it is also one of the most frustrating challenges, an exquisite torture in fact, because there are just TOO MANY BOOKS I WANT TO BUY! I feel a mounting sense of urgency as I wander through the stacks of books...I want to read that, and that, and That, and THAT!...or at least try them out to see if they are any good...And I wish I could just read my whole life. Then I wonder if all these books will be available to read in eternity. Will bad books disappear with the return of Christ? Will sections of books disappear? Will words disappear? Are bad words unknown in heaven? I mean, even if we try to remember them, will we be able to? Or are earthly books banned? Will there be just books written in heaven there? In any event, I think in my heavenly mansion, or maybe just next door, there is going to be a huge, grand library- I mean, football stadiums huge- with rolling ladders and everything. And best of all, there will be TIME to read them ALL.

( Don't) Let them eat...CHEESE!

Well, work today was like sitting on a bucket of eels on a tiger's back while trying to play the bagpipes, thread a sewing needle with twine, and tapdance. In other words, I was exhausted by the end of it. It was like being pecked to death by ten thousand chickens. If it were up to me, I think I would let the girls sleep in until lunch tomorrow. But no. It is not up to me.

But to spare you the same feeling of " WHAT am I doing here?", I will recount only one of the charming things I experienced today. One of the current residents is lactose intolerant. If she wants to eat a dairy product, she has to take special lactose pills. Hmmm. Well, apparently, there is some trouble in Denmark. Or something is rotten in paradise. There is disagreement about the source of this problem amongst the staff. Some think that the lactose pills aren't working because her system has gotten immune to them. Someone else thinks that she's not taking them long enough before she eats in order for them to be effective. Either way, she has gotten seriously sick recently. Why, in fact, just this afternoon, she and two other girls were upstairs with me doing laundry in the bathroom when she rushed into a stall and proceeded to upchuck her lunch into the toilet. And it didn't just happen once. Poor thing. It was not a fun thing to hear. I suppose it is good training to be a mother. ( No, I'm really not pregnant.) ( I'll probably tell you if/when I am.) I think it would be a lot simpler if she would just not eat dairy. Easy for me to say. I think I'd probably go out of my mind if I couldn't eat dairy. Well, all in a day's work. And guess what? I get to go back again tomorrow!

I just went to the funeral of Amos Anderson yesterday - a first class saint. One of the speakers at the service told a little story about when someone thanked him for his years of hard work and service to others, he said, " I did it for Jesus." I thought, Wow. Could I truly say that about my job? Do I honestly consider my work as ' unto the Lord?' I have to be honest here and say that I don't think I have had that attitude very much lately. A lot of times, I am so focused on where I am in the week...( Is it Monday? Wah. Is it Friday? Woohoo!)...or what I have to do ( Ugh- I have to go do meds...)...or where my current sanity level is...( today, the thought crossed my mind more than once that I wanted to bolt for the door, and make a screaming exit)...or check my paystub to see how many paid time off hours I have accrued recently...You get the picture. I have been inspired by Amos Anderson to look at my job not just as the thing I have to do, but something I can do, something I can give - an offering of my life to Jesus. Yes, an offering that may seem pretty mundane most of the time, but it's not the thing you're doing, but the attitude of your heart that counts. For instance, Brad didn't end up finding a car for me at the auction today. He almost got one that seemed perfect but then he smelled the inside and knew that I couldn't stand the smell of cigarette smoke and so he didn't buy it. He offered up his day off to buy me a car, and came home empty handed and discouraged, and I think I love him even more because of it.

So, back to the whole job thing... I have to say, if it's just for the money, or just to make me feel good because I am helping someone, or for me to have fun, it's not really going to satisfy. So, thanks, Mr. Anderson. I'll remember that.