Wednesday, June 13, 2007

BLINK, people!

I have a new pet peeve: people who don't use their blinkers.

On Wednesdays I drive about an hour north of where I live to take my student to a speech therapy appointment. I skim over the interstate, through the middle of Atlanta; there isn't a lot of backroad driving. I am a-MAZED at how many negligent, non-signalling people there are on the road. I should have kept track of how many - there were QUITE a lot today. And this is not Grandma out for a tourist jaunt; these are seemingly NORMAL people. Normal except for one thing - they change lanes like they're in a videogame. Zoop! Swish! Whoosh. It drives me CRAZY. It's dangerous AND inconsiderate. I expostulate in an outraged tone at these slackers ( really - how hard is it to nudge your blinker?! It takes a fraction of a second and burns probably an infinitesimal fraction of a calorie), which never ceases to amuse my passenger. He chuckles benignly. Ha ha - glad my road rage is so entertaining. At least, I try to camouflage it by employing my Muppet/Lambchops voice so that it really is somewhat humorous ... otherwise, I'd be feeling guilty that my ungraceful impatience would be negatively influencing my protege. This way, I'm just crazy Claire, indulging in a comic railing session at the bad drivers of the world.

In my rage fueled daydreams, I appoint myself as some sort of guardian of highway safety and justice, fasten an automatic harpoon thrower on the roof of my car, and fire off harpoons, complete with an attached ticket ( which would entail a massive fine) at offending vehicles.

I mean, it's one thing to neglect to use your blinker when you're turning into your driveway late at night when no one is behind you. Snore. It's very much another thing to not use it when you're barreling down a tight corridor of interstate at 75 mph, hemmed in by sky scrapers and teeming mobs of traffic, with spaces about the size of my foot between vehicles. Grrrr.

AND at a four way intersection. Hello?! Am I supposed to READ YOUR MIND?

15 comments:

DJ said...

Only a harpoon gun?

I know I've thought about machine guns, rpg's[rocket propelled grenades] and good old fashioned spikes[like in the Chariot Race in Ben-hur].

I share your feelings of peevishness at this problem...

ljmax said...

You and Ethan both. He has recently become a blinker stickler, informing us sternly when we forget to use ours.
All the important times, like turning into ones own driveway when no one is behind you.

brilynne said...

I just read an article in Time magazine that mentioned that Mitt Romney is a member of the MySpace group (yes, apparently it is a big thing for candidates to have a myspace...brings in the delinquent voters) called"Somethingorother for the Enforcement of Turn Signals." You guys are kindred spirits! I wonder if he ever sings that he wants to "Ram him with many rams."

Aaron said...

Non-blinker people bother me too, although in NH we are all such courteous drivers that it's never, ever a problem. (Wink, wink.) I miss your road rage, Claire.

claire said...

Awwwww, Aaaaaaron....how sweet of you to miss my road rage! I feel REALLY guilty now that I think of how I DIDN'T camouflage it with you guys - no Lambchops/Muppet voices for you guys...You bore the brunt of my rightous indignation!

And Bria! I forgot about "ram him with many rams!" I guess Mitt Romney gets my vote - Mormoninity notwithstanding!

Claire said...

And L, I'm glad to hear that you're raising a safe driver. Hey- it should help your insurance costs someday.

Maybe he'll be a driver's ed teacher!

DJ- I like the Ben Hur idea!

Keith said...

I didn't even know modern cars still had blinkers on them. How quaint.

kw said...

Yikes...scary Keith! As for the aforementioned drivers..guess that's the redneck land of GA fer ya. I just hope none of it eventually rubs off on such a lovely person as you, or Brad.

Lori said...

You covered it, nailed it, said it for us all in the most passionate, appropriate way. And now I have a goofy song to be stuck in my head--"Ram him with many rams." I know I'm not going to forget that even if I want to. Ha ha!

Amy said...

Ugh, yes!!! I SO hate that!! I am impulsive blinker-er...sometimes I forget and even blinker into my driveway. Or I feel silly when I start to blinker and realize I'm just going around a curve.

My dad is one of those non-blinker-ers. When I ride with him and he doesn't signal I comment on how unfortunate that his nice car didn't come with blinkers, or how sad that they are broken. He goes about his merry way as if I have not spoken...side effect of 30+ years married to my mother. :) But that can't stop me!! :)

kayla said...

Yep, forgetting to turn on one's blinker is practically an unforgivable sin!!! As my driver's ed teacher would say, "Does it hurt?":)

Amy said...

Hm. Tapioca. I haven't had that since I was very, very young. And way back then I thought the texture was just a little too weird. Perhaps I should try it again with my mature, open-minded tastebuds because you make it sound yummy. :)

DJ said...

ryc-not Jack so much, even though that obviously fits the description. I'd prefer to be Locke myself, Great White Hunter, and all that :-)

BUT, Jack is better looking. and since I live in the Urban Jungle, good looks are more important than being able to take down a boar with a hunting knife ;-)

asaphat said...

Yeah, signaling is a must...except people who do it at Fairwood are a little carried away, I think. I mean, "blink, blink, blink...I'm turning left at the top of the Church Hill" is a bit much. :-)

Mostly I just came here to answer your question and tell you why I'm going to be at Logan. I'm flying to CA with DJ, Andrea, Amy, and Lindsay for Matt Stamper's wedding! It's Saturday, and we're getting there Wednesday and hanging out cool places beforehand. Should be a blast! (we'll see if I still love airports when I arrive in one at 4:30 am...as long as they have a Dunkin Donuts, I should be golden!)

kw said...

funny how the longer you leave it between posts, the more comments you get--that is on your blog- not a universal thing...you should try not posting for a month and set a record...not suggesting anything. there might be a riot...