Saturday, February 24, 2007

My resume bloomed

There's nothing quite like the advent of spring to slough off your old ways of thinking and reinvigorate you for life ahead. Warmer temperatures are pretty much a miracle working cure for my spirit. Suddenly, things seem possible that I thought were impossible. It's like I never knew there was anything beautiful in the world- and then I saw a daffodil for the first time in my life. I know we don't have the bleakness of dirty snow to contend with down here but orange and brown can get pretty tedious on the eyes after four months...

And there's nothing like a seed of a resume blossoming into an interview to remind you that life could change very quickly. I thought that seed had died- I had forgotten about it. I have sown so many resumes in so many places that I can't keep track of them all. There are a few that I actually do monitor more closely than others, but seeing as how the harvest has been fairly pitiful, it's not something in which I invest a whole lot of emotional energy. ( Hmmmm- is that a cause or an effect? Some kind of defense mechanism, no doubt.) (Or is it affect? Andrea? Keith? Other English majors?) In this particular case, I had cast my resume on the waters over a month ago with little hopes of any result but lo, yesterday, it returned - in the form of a phone call.

Now, part of me thinks that I should sit down at the beginning of the interview and say that they should just skip right to the part where they tell me that they aren't going to choose me after all and we can get this whole charade done and behind us. Honestly, it seems like a long shot. So much so that I hesitated even to mention it here. I don't want people to be all, "Oh, Claire! I hope you get the job!" because what if I don't...or what if I do and I hate it. I didn't even tell my parents about it yesterday when we went on a walk together. I just didn't want to talk about it. My hopes are not up at all, by any stretch of the imagination. I'm just going to go and do the interview and that's that. I'm sure I'm qualified for it but I'm not really sure I want to work there. But- actually getting a job almost isn't even the point. As pathetic as it sounds, simply getting an interview is a pretty big deal at this juncture. It means that at least there are possibilities out there! After living in the same old confined, dreary, depressing rut for months ( a rut at least partially of my own mental creation but very real and all-consuming nonetheless), it's an encouragement to know that THINGS CAN CHANGE ON A DIME dramatically if God wants it that way. And if they don't change right away, well...there must be a reason.

7 comments:

drewey fern said...

Generally:
effect - noun
affect - verb

You did it right! Interestingly, the phrase "cause and effect" is how I keep the two straight:)

As for your conclusion to this post - right on! If God wants it, it will happen, and if not He has something better than that for you!

I'll pray for His will and your happiness.

DJ said...

God is Good...

Aaron said...

Spring is nice. We had a taste of it today, even here in the North. I like the sports potential of winter, but there's still nothing like sunshine and fresh spring air to lighten the spirits!

lis said...

GREAT reminder - thanks, m'dear!

*praying*

Anonymous said...

You don't need to feel jealous any longer! Love, Mrs. B

Claire said...

YESSSSSSSS!!!! Mrs. B, you're awesome!

asaphat said...

Claire, I relate. In the past five years I've been through so many music school/scholarship applications/interviews/exams/rejection letters that I just don't even want to tell the world if and when I'm trying again. Because when I do, I get asked about the results for months. It's like a great big secret to try to keep. So feel free to keep your own secrets; I understand.

And I know I'm not an English major, but I totally have this question covered (flesh out what Andrea said):

when you're using it as a noun, it's always E-ffect

They both can be used as verbs, with different meanings
"effect" = to cause, bring about (as in "effect a change")
"affect" = to influence (as in "what factors affected your decision")